Instead of being a meaningless phrase used to sign off on an email or a sentiment that is only expressed after the fact, our research suggests that intentionally expressing gratitude in advance of a distressing or difficult task may favorably influence employee behavior. To do so effectively, our research suggests these four steps can make a difference:
1. Anticipate distress, difficulty, and unpleasant emotions.
The first step, and most important, is the anticipation of an employee’s experience of distress, difficulty, or unpleasant emotions (e.g., anxiety, frustration). This requires not only being aware of what is going on in the moment, but also what is likely to happen in the future. Try to take on the perspective of your employee: what about what they’re being asked to do might be painful or difficult? This awareness and anticipation can come from a number of places, including your own prior experience and knowledge that the task ahead will be unpleasant, the other person’s prior experience the last time they had to engage in the task (in our example, having layoff conversations), or something that the other person shares with you directly (e.g., “I’m really dreading these layoff conversations on Friday”). Rather than hoping it won’t be that big of a deal, invalidating, or trivializing the situation, you can use this information to take prescient, preemptive action.
2. Show genuine gratitude.
Before the employee goes into a difficult and distressing situation, express genuine gratitude to them. In order for this expression of gratitude to be effective, it needs to include a number of features, including being specifically tailored to the person and non-generic, of appropriate intensity, and not too over the top given the current situation and nature of the relationship — inauthentic gratitude will not yield desired results. It’s also important to use words that explicitly describe why the employee’s behavior matters and is impactful. In expressing genuine gratitude, you should remind the employee that their behavior — even though the situation is difficult and distressing — has a positive impact in furthering the group or organization’s goals, and that their contributions are truly valued by the team and organization. Our research finds that expressing gratitude (anticipatory or otherwise) has a positive effect on employees’ sense of collective social worth, and detailing how it benefits the team can help reiterate it.
3. Check in after the situation.
Check in with the employee after the situation has concluded. While anticipatory expressions of gratitude serve an important emotion regulatory function that buffers the negative experience, “thanks in advance,” no matter how heartfelt, does not completely eliminate the negative emotional experience. Prompt the employee with open-ended questions such as, “Tell me about how it went,” “How are you feeling now?” or “How can I best support you?” Additionally, these conversations can help you to better understand your employee, what the pain points of their position are, and can help improve your ability to provide proactive gratefulness in the future, as you’ll better understand what about a task makes it most challenging. If necessary, repeat your genuine expression of gratitude to the employee after the event. A little gratitude repetition never hurts, especially for employees who seldom hear it at work.
4. Cultivate a culture of gratitude.
Our findings suggest that gratitude in advance is successful in part because it makes people feel a strong sense of collective social worth. They believe they are a valued part of the team and that their contributions to this team are meaningful, even when the tasks are difficult. While it’s important for managers to give gratitude in advance, supervisors should also encourage their team to liberally extend gratitude amongst themselves; for example, expressing genuine gratitude to other team members when they embark on a project or new initiative together, or when one team member does something helpful for another team member. And don’t forget to express gratitude upwards to supervisors (a new spin on what some refer to as “managing up” or “caring for the caregivers”). This is likely to create an even stronger sense of connectedness throughout the organization, which could further boost employees’ resilience should they meet obstacles along the way.
According to Gallup’s Global Emotions report, negative emotions are higher today than they were a decade ago. There’s a lot about work that can be difficult and distressing, and this can contribute to the general dread that many employees feel about their work, not just on Sunday night. While many of these challenges cannot be immediately solved, they can be assessed and acknowledged in advance. One of the most meaningful ways to acknowledge others’ efforts is to not wait until after the fact, but to anticipate it. A little “thanks in advance” can go a long way.
Read the full article here / By Hooria Jazaieri and Olivia (Mandy) O’Neill
Courtesy of Harvard Business Review
